The British Government in an attempt to curb the ‘increasing’ scourge of knife related violence has decreed that youths caught carrying a knife should be made to visit victims of knife crime in hospital. Genius. I mean what would really stop a young kid, scared enough to carry a knife at the thought of being attacked by other kids with knives, other than seeing how gruesome knife wounds are. Plus if you’d just been put in hospital with a knife wound then getting lots of visits from young thugs, some of whom might even be the ones who knifed you, would surely be a wonderful aid to the healing process. Not.
Perhaps a better way to fix this would be to take an approach like learner plates on cars. Until you’ve learnt that carrying a knife is not a responsible way to behave then you should be forced to wear an embarrassing t-shirt or cap visible at all times, something so ugly and patently designed by a committee of caring types that it could never become a badge of honour. In fact can I suggest the London Olympic logo committee as a good place to start for design suggestions.